I\u2019ve heard it said that there are only two things that motivate us\u2014winning and trying not to lose. We get excited when we think we\u2019re winning (\u201cI got a great job,\u201d \u201cThat was a fantastic meal I cooked,\u201d \u201cMy daughter made the basketball team\u201d) and anxious when we think we\u2019re losing (\u201cThis traffic is going to make me late,\u201d \u201cIf I can\u2019t fall asleep I\u2019ll be too tired for work tomorrow,\u201d \u201cI can\u2019t deal with this back pain\u201d).<\/p>\n
When you look at your personal goals, how many are related to winning or losing? How often are you grading yourself on whether you\u2019re doing better than your neighbor, your cousin, your high school buddy, or even yourself from last year?<\/p>\n
When we are competing, we assess everything we do based on whether we think it puts us further ahead or further behind. Even when we\u2019re doing something we enjoy\u2014going for a walk, playing the piano, fishing\u2014we\u2019re deciding whether we\u2019re doing it well, whether we\u2019re getting as much enjoyment out of it as we should, and whether it\u2019s helping us win or causing us to lose. In other words, we take pleasurable activities and basically turn them into chores.<\/p>\n
What would it be like to do something without judging whether you\u2019re winning or losing? What would it mean to enjoy an activity just for its own sake with no worries about how it turned out? What happens if we do something just for the experience and not with a focus on self-improvement? Maybe allowing ourselves to spend time wastefully\u2014with no expectations\u2014is actually the only way not to waste it!<\/p>\n
This 4-minute video explores basic steps to experience mindfulness. Drs. Christiane Wolf and Greg Serpa discuss four basic practices that teach us how to truly focus on the present moment without wondering whether we\u2019re doing it right.<\/p>\n