{"id":81646,"date":"2024-01-07T23:00:00","date_gmt":"2024-01-08T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/?p=81646"},"modified":"2024-01-08T13:44:06","modified_gmt":"2024-01-08T13:44:06","slug":"dont-be-like-me-dont-hesitate-to-have-those-difficult-conversations-about-suicide","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/?p=81646","title":{"rendered":"Don\u2019t be like me: don\u2019t hesitate to have those difficult conversations about suicide"},"content":{"rendered":"
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\n \u201cCam, this will sound like a weird question, but could we do a quick counseling session? Scheduled to be determined. Unofficial.\u201d This was the last message I received from a fellow service member and friend who I met more than 13 years ago in school. I did not respond. Thirty-two days later he took his own life.
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KAISERSLAUTERM, Germany \u2013 \u201cCam, this will sound like a weird question, but could we do a quick counseling session? Scheduled to be determined. Unofficial.\u201d<\/p>\n

This was the last message I received from a fellow service member and friend who I met more than 13 years ago in school. I did not respond. Thirty-two days later he took his own life.<\/p>\n

Several times during the months leading up to this message, he would reach out to me wanting to talk. He\u2019d tell me about his personal tribulations at work and at home and ask me for my advice and counsel. Usually, we\u2019d go back and forth on chat for a while, he\u2019d thank me, and we\u2019d sign off. Once or twice, he wanted to talk with me by phone, which we did.<\/p>\n

But each time \u2013 whether over the phone or in chat \u2013 I always felt weirded out and honestly, I felt unempathetic, too. I couldn\u2019t place myself in his situation. I couldn\u2019t understand how he allowed his personal life and career to go so array so quickly and so terribly. He was a Navy Reserve Lieutenant Commander O-4 and a father of two young children with a promising future.<\/p>\n

Now that I\u2019ve learned of his passing \u2013 I found out over the weekend \u2013 I feel more than terrible. I could have done so much more. I could have shown more empathy for him and his situation. I could have taken more time to help him think through his issues and sort through his options. I could have at least responded to his last message.<\/p>\n

Suicide is not a personal issue. It\u2019s a societal issue. It\u2019s everyone\u2019s business and responsibility. If you know someone who is suffering, be there. Be a good human. Put them ahead of yourself. I didn\u2019t do that. Don\u2019t be like me.<\/p>\n

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\n The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline offers 24\/7 calls, texts and chat access to trained crisis counselors who can help people experiencing suicidal, substance use, mental health crisis, or any other kind of emotional distress. If stationed in Europe, the 988 number doesn\u2019t work. Here, please dial 00-800-1273-8255 and save this number in your contacts.
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The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline offers 24\/7 calls, texts and chat access to trained crisis counselors who can help people experiencing suicidal, substance use, mental health crisis, or any other kinds of emotional distress. If stationed in Europe, the 988 number doesn\u2019t work. Here, please dial 00-800-1273-8255 and save this number in your contacts.<\/p>\n

Suicidal behavior is universal, and it knows no boundaries. Starting this new year, let\u2019s do everything we can to help normalize a culture of open communication and trust, and to eliminate suicides. It\u2019s 100 percent preventable. Don\u2019t hesitate to have those difficult conversations with your family members, friends and coworkers. Put them ahead of yourself. I didn\u2019t do that. Don\u2019t be like me.<\/p>\n

\u201cCam, this will sound like a weird question, but could we do a quick counseling session? Scheduled to be determined. Unofficial.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course. Of course, we can.\u201d<\/p>\n

(Cameron Porter is the Public Affairs Officer for the 405th Army Field Support Brigade, a retired Command Sergeant Major, and a Soldier for Life)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cCam, this will sound like a weird question, but could we do a quick counseling session? Scheduled to be determined. Unofficial.\u201d This was the last message I received from a fellow service member and friend who I met more than 13 years ago in school. I did not respond. Thirty-two days later he took his […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":81648,"comment_status":"close","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-81646","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81646","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=81646"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81646\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":81651,"href":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81646\/revisions\/81651"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/81648"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=81646"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=81646"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adn.monetizemail.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=81646"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}